Work Phrases

USEFUL WORK PHRASES

1. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
2. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.

3. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
4. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

5. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't care.

6. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.

7. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?

8. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

9. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

10. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

11. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.

12. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.

13. No, my powers can only be used for good.

14. How about never? Is never good for you?

15. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.

16. You sound reasonable. Time to up my medication.

17. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

18. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message .

19. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.

20. Who me? I just wander from room to room.

21. My toys! My toys! I can't do this job without my toys!

22. It might look like I'm doing nothing, but at the cellular level I'm really quite busy.

23. At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits.

24. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

25. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

26. Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.
By POH from USA.

99 cents for downloading music

Downloading music in the Internet
As many of you, for several years I downloaded illegally, several thousand songs to various MP3 players, today, I own an Apple iPod player that can hold all of my songs in its memory. At the time I did my illegal downloading, starting from Napster, I had no other options, now that we do, I suggest, the much better alternative of paying 99 cents per song, buying only the songs you like from within a CD and avoiding the following problems, now present in my iPod:

* Songs suddenly ending (even though I thought, I knew how to avoid this problem).
* Poor sound quality 25% of the time.
* Tremendous disparity in the sound level among songs.
* Sudden augmentation in the sound level within a song.
Additionally, you can save yourself:
* Hundreds of recording hours.
* Personal guilt.
* Having to hear others telling you than you are dishonest.
* Lately, even risking a jail sentence.
99 cents is not much to pay to avoid the above pitfalls!
By Superman from Chicago USA.

Reduse Stress

Reduce Stress
Easier said than done, stress busters come in many forms. Some techniques recommended by experts are to think positive thoughts. Spend 30 minutes a day doing something you like. (i.e.,Soak in a hot tub; walk on the beach or in a park; read a good book; visit a friend; play with your dog; listen to soothing music; watch a funny movie. Get a massage, a facial or a haircut. Meditate. Count to ten before losing your temper or getting aggravated. Avoid difficult people when possible. Thought for the day: When seeing red, think pink clouds….then float on them.

By Peter Prestipino from Chicago USA.

Hiccup Cure

Hiccup Cure
Place a silver butter knife in an 8 ounce glass of water. Drink all 8 ounces of the water with the handle of the knife resting against your cheek. This may sound a bit crazy but it NEVER fails!

By Michael Talen from New Orleans USA.